St. Patricks Day Dick Gifts

Pint ‘O Dicks


In stock

A Pint Glass full of dicks.

Ever since Mr. Dick was a wee lad, he’s been stuffing his dick in each and every vessel that could withstand a wicked onslaught of 2.8 centimeters. In fact, things got so bad that Grandfather dick had to sell the whole flock due to a series of “familial transgressions.” Insert Sad Trombone here. Despite the shame and guilt of losing the family farm, he’s kept at it, for we all know you can’t teach an old dog new dicks.

The most recent dick-stuffing fixation involves his other lifelong passion: drinking. As soon as he finishes his pint of Jameson’s, he slams it onto the bar and promptly fills it with dicks. So we invite all ye O’Malleys and Shaughnessys out there to join the St. Paddy’s Day Cockathon and treat ye selves to a Pint O’ Dicks. Hand crafted by sloppy leprechauns from the glassy moats of Galway, these vessels will protect your drink like a vigilante shepherd. Be you alone, unhappily married or on the wire with the rest of the birds, the Pint O’ Dicks is the perfect hype man to kickstart your holiday clusterfuck. Erin Go Bragh, Brah!

Each pint glass will be ship full of dicks. Think of it as a multi-use vessel.


Every order is sent anonymously!
Your secret is safe with us.

Weight16 oz
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