The Gummy Dicks!
The Gummy Dicks!
The Gummy Dicks!

The Gummy Dicks!

Regular price $14.99 $0.00 Unit price per

 Are you ready to eat a Bag of Swedish Dicks??

Tired of the same old gummer from the Romanian widow in apartment 2B?
Does sugar daddy insist on deep V diving dentures-first?
Weep no more, my unfortunate saps, for we’ve got a cumload of gummy dicks to plunder that rickety relation-Ship. 100% organic, trans-fat free and handpicked by the severed fingers of unionized factory workers, these DDT-free, anti-agent orange amalgams of corn syrup and gelatin are the gummy dicks you can feel good about. I repeat—other gummy dicks are made primarily from the flesh of baby seals. Baby Seal barely makes our ingredient list. Unlike those other guys, our gummy dicks stand erect for diversity too! They cum in and on every color. So wait no longer, my waffling stomper. Send a bag of dicks by mail today!

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