29" Puzzle Dick

Cutting up a dick is not just for circumcision anymore!  

Behold, the 29" Puzzle Dick.
Add a custom message and then we'll throw the dick in our laser cutting machine. We'll pull some levers, jiggle some gears, hit a button or two, and the laser beam will take care of the rest.
It will slice up that dick with the precision and grace of the finest of dick surgeons.

Your friends and loved ones will receive a box of the pieces and will have to assemble it to reveal the message! Make them work for that 'Happy Birthday' greeting or maybe add just one more layer to that passive-aggressive note to your favorite neighbor who turns up their car stereo a little too loud and a little too early...
(seriously Frank...nobody wants to hear Cardi b at 5:07am on a Tuesday...)

Or maybe you feel like joining millions of other bored Americans who use a puzzle as an excuse to not have to talk to anyone at a family gathering. You'll send a clear message to Aunt Jean without having to open your mouth.

Each dick starts out 29" long and 17" wide.
Enter your custom message in the box above. 
Message is 35 Characters MAX

Every order is sent anonymously!
Your secret is safe with us.